Tomorrow I’m off. That’s a very good thing. I’ve worked 15 out of the last 20 days. That doesn’t sound so bad until you add all the school, outreach and Sozo into the mix. So I have been pretty busy since I returned from Australia. I just realized that I really haven’t had the time to recover from the Australian trip. Well I’m off tomorrow and then start another 6 straight days of work. November starts next week, and although I’m only working 13 days, the first four start right away. Then I go to Greenville SC for the weekend and then back to work. I’m just glad I’m still young. I don’t think an old man could handle this pace.
Seriously, I am a little tired. It’s probably from work today and then Healing Prayer tonight. I will probably work on homework mainly tomorrow morning. I might ride the Harley down to Town Center for a Lunch appointment, and then see what tomorrow brings. I do have a Sozo tomorrow night, but that should be fun. I’m glad that Saturday morning is at 9:20 instead of 5AM. So I should be able to get ome more rest on Saturday. I know Sunday will be super busy, with work starting at 6PM.
Am I Crazy? Maybe, but I really am having fun doing all the things that I am involved in, and work does taper off next month, and I am only going to work about 6 days in December. So I think that I am almost over the hump. I do know my limits, and I will pull back if I think that they are being exceeded. I know that I am approaching the edge right now, and if I feel that I need to, I’ll cancel the trip to Greenville next weekend and stay home and rest. I’ll probably make that decision by Tuesday night.
Isn’t it funny how grief sneaks up on you? I was driving to work this morning listening to the radio (Oldies of course) then a certain song came on. I don’t even remember the song right now, but I found my eyes tearing up as I thought about Julia and how much I missed her. It was over in an instant, but once again I realized how the healing of a heart, and dealing with loss really does take time. I know that I am doing very well. I know that God is good, and He has been so good to me and my family in this time, but what I have learned is that grieving is a process. I do believe that process can and should be shortened by the strong presence of God in our lives. But it is still a process, nonetheless. That means that no matter how good I am doing, I still have certain moments. That’s OK and healthy. I need to let them happen, embrace them and then release them. That’s easier now than it was a few months ago. I no longer feel the deep lows trying to pull me down. Now it’s sort of like turbulence on a flight. It really feels like more of a nuisance than a danger. However, I know there are some rough patches ahead as we approach and deal with the holidays. That’s OK. We will be together as a family and I know that God has us together as a family for a purpose. I’m awaiting that purpose.
So, I think that’s all for tonight. I really feel more relaxed than I did when I started tonight, but I am going to bed soon. I will definitely enjoy tomorrow! But, I really enjoy every day!!