It was a beautiful day today, but I was really too busy to enjoy it. I drove well over 200 miles. First I went down to the airport for work and then back up to Acworth to visit the oral surgeon. Finally back down to Peachtree City and back for outreach and school. In between I had a full day of work a doctors appointment, two hours of outreach and then almost three and a half hours of school. I am definitely tired. I’ve been up since three and it’s after eleven now. The good news is that I am off tomorrow. I have nothing except school. So I can catch up on my bills, do a little homework and hopefully get a run in. The key to getting everything done is getting out of bed as a decent hour, and not sleeping to late. I will set the alarm, but the big problem is just making myself get up when it goes off.
Anna Roan called me this afternoon. It was the first time she has called me in a while. It was good to hear her voice and hear the excitement when she was talking to me. I hate it that we too often lose the excitement in our lives. We let them become drab and very bland. How does that happen? We are not here on this earth long enough to lose the excitement. If Julia’s death has done anything to me, it has made me aware of the short time that I have, or anyone has, to make an impact for the Kingdom of God. I want to live the rest of my life to the fullest. Some of the things I am contemplating I might not do, but I have to let myself dream, and get out of any box that I have allowed myself to get into. Yes, we all get into ruts or boxes, but we all don’t see them in time to get out. Then life just seems to pass us by. There is too much to do, and really too much fun to have to stay in the rut.
Sean Boltz is speaking at school this week. He is a well-known prophet, but is still young. He has started a church in Hollywood California, ministering to those in the media. He was very interesting tonight. I have to listen to what he said again, but a couple of his main points were that Jesus saw the big picture. It’s not just about our church, but our city and our state and our nation. Jesus went after people groups and nations. We need to be praying for and going after bigger things than we are going after. The second was that everything we do needs to be done out of love. We need to spend time with God until we can pray and prophecy out of His heart. It’s his love that releases ministry. Healing flows out of love, prophecy flows out of love too. We have to get the Father’s heart. As we get His heart, we can see through His eyes what needs to be done. We need His dreams in our life.
I have come to realize this major point. I think it is a very important point. People have been speaking it into me for over a month, but I think that I am beginning to get it. I still have a destiny. I knew that, but here is the tricky part. My destiny has changed. When Julia was alive, WE had a destiny; we had dreams, things that we were going after. We were a team and we were working together to fulfill all that God had for us. But when things shift in the natural, they also shift in the spiritual. Julia’s death was like an earthquake in my world, and in some ways in the spiritual world as well. Things shifted. I will still be going after some of the same things that we were going after as a couple, but I will also be going after different things. The enemy thought that by taking Julia out, he could derail us from our destiny in the Kingdom. What he didn’t realize was that God has bigger plans, and I am a part of new dreams and a new destiny. In order to gain Heaven’s justice for Julia I have to be able to reevaluate everything that I am doing and involved in. I am praying that God will give me a laser like focus to do the things He wants me to do. I don’t want the good to get in the way of the best.
So I am excited, and a little apprehensive. I truly believe that the major part of my life ministry has yet to be completed. That means that I will be more active and engaged in the next ten to fifteen years than I have in the past. It also means that I will have many doors to choose from, and I only want to go through the ones that God wants me to go through. The hard part is that for every new door I go through, I probably will have to close an old door. So I truly believe that the next months over the summer are going to be a time of self-examination, prayer and evaluation. If my focus is refined, my options are narrowed. I can’t do everything, but I must do all the things that the Father wants and nothing more. It should be an interesting few months. Let’s get it on.
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