Well, I’m sitting by the fire in my rocking chair listening to Bing Crosby singing Winter Wonderland. It’s one of the Christmas songs in my “Christmas song list” on the Ipod. Yes, Christmas is coming fast. I’ve been so busy this week that I haven’t really thought of it. Yes, I have done most of my shopping, but just to sit down and think about Christmas, I haven’t done that until now. I could sit and listen to Christmas music all night. All of a sudden I am just very lonely. It’s amazing how fast the loss of Julia can overtake me, and the how fast it can pass. I am coming to realize that there will be lonely times, but I have to focus on the good memories that we shared and not the fact that she is not here. That is why I am so glad that we will all be together at Hilton Head this year. I know that she would have loved that.
Julia didn’t really like Bing Crosby that much as a singer, but she knew that I was very sentimental at Christmas, and I had grown up listening to all his Christmas songs as a kid, So, she let me pretty much pick out the selection of Christmas songs. I guess since I was a singer as a child, I was more into all the songs, and I tend to love the old classics at Christmas. So tonight and for the next couple of weeks I will be listening to all these old songs that Julia and I both ave listened to for year after year. It will be fun, but at the same time I’m sure that there will be tender moments as well.
The flight home tonight was uneventful. On the drive from Redding to Sacramento we had a rear tire that was going flat and we had to change. Ben did most of the work and it didn’t take very long. We were able to change it in a service station and not on the road. So we left Redding at about 10 EST and I got to the house at 9EST, It was a long travel day, but over all it wasn’t to hard. Tomorrow is church and then outreach. We have face down tomorrow night, but I might pass on that. I have homework for school to do and I have to work on Monday morning. So it will be back in the groove this next week. I work four days this week and then three next week. That’s it for the month. It’s really going to be cold this week, hopefully it will get warmer when we are at Hilton Head.
Thinking back to the summit, when I was in the prison outreach I realized how prophetic these two people who led the session were. You could just tell when they talked. Well, at the end of the session they prayed for us and imparted gifting in us. As I was finishing, I had been holding Les’s hand as he prayed for me. Before he let it go he just looked into my eyes and asked me if I had been beaten up in the Spirit. I just looked at him and briefly told him about Julia’s death. Then he prayed for me again, brushing things off and breaking things off. Although I didn’t realize that I still carried much of the pain, evidently I did. It was a good prayer. I am amazed at the goodness of God, and how he uses the gifts of the Spirit to minister to people.
So, although I think that I am totally healed sometimes, in reality it is still in process. But I am doing well, and God just used Les to move things along a little bit. I am so blessed to be in the culture of revival that I walk in, both at RiverStone and at Bethel. I can’t think of anywhere else in the world I had rather be right now. Truly He is about to perform wonders beyond our imagination.