Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Day 135 - Dreams

Dreams are a funny thing. Sometimes they make sense, sometimes they don’t. Sometimes they are long and involved and sometimes they are short. Sometimes they make sense and sometimes they don’t. Sometimes they are from God and sometimes they are not. At any rate, I don’t dream a lot, and I try to remember when I do dream. I do dream in color most of the time. I know that our Spirit never sleeps. I used to dream of flying, not in a plane, but just folding my arms and flying. I think I wrote about that in on of my other blogs. At any rate, I did dream last night. For the first time since Julia dies, she was in the dream. She looked just like she did, smiling and happy. We were happy and sitting in a field with children. I couldn’t tell who the children were, only that they were young. She looked at me, and put her finger on my neck. There was a some sort of necklace around it. She smiled and said to me, “Oh, you’re wearing a necklace again, I like it.” Then it was over, that was it. Now in our married life I have worn a necklace twice. Once in Hawaii I had a puka shell necklace that I wore when I was off duty. Then in the late 70’s thru the late 80’s I had a gold chain that I wore. That’s the only time that I have worn one. However I have been thinking about getting another gold chain. NO! I’m not going through a midlife crisis. I think I’ve already done that. I have been thinking about when the time comes to take off my wedding ring that I would put it on a chain around my neck. That way it would always be close to my heart. It’s just a passing thought right now, but the dream brought it to my memory.

I hate filling out forms right now. I hate the forms that have you give your marital status. I can’t really say I’m married, but I don’t feel single. I refuse to check the term widowed or widower. So I normally just leave it blank if I can. You see I feel married and I don’t care if I always feel that way. I still have my wedding ring on, and I am comfortable with it like that. But every now and then someone, usually at work ask about my family and my wife. Then the conversation either gets complicated or quiet. I know that someday I will take the ring off, probably for the reasons I just stated. It will be to complicated to explain. But I will have to be told by Holy Spirit or Jesus or Papa to do it. It might take all three. Who knows? But for right now I’m comfortable. I might get the chain or I might not. I have no idea.

Anyway, back to the dream. It was good to have it, and good to see her smiling at me. I don’t know of any other significance. I do want more dreams. I’m praying for them. Not about Julia, but dreams from God. Dreams that help define destiny and calling. I want dreams that confirm prophetic words. So I’m asking Papa to increase my dream life and give me the gift of interpretation.

Today was a good day. I was off, and after watching 24 last night, I slept until 8. I got up and went for an hour run. Then I came home, had breakfast on the deck. I was able to read some and have a quiet time out there. I went out for a while and then came home. I have been here since around 2. In my office I had numerous piles of paperwork waiting for my attention, so that’s where I spent the afternoon. Not very exciting, but I got a lot accomplished. All day, I have just been resting in the awesome love of God. I know that most people haven’t experienced His love to the depths that I have this year. I know that I can’t persuade them to change their minds with fine words. All I can do is be a living example of someone who knows the Father’s love so deeply. Then I can help lead them into an experience. I want to give it away, but so many people just don’t want to take it. It really makes me sad. It also makes me want to be able to relate to them so much more. If they could only really see what He is like. Well, I’m learning, and if I continue, I am sure I will be able to share more with them. So I wonder if Julia really does want me to get the necklace, or if it was just a dream? I’ll have to think, meditate and pray in that one.

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