It’s really hard to get started tonight. First, I worked late and it’s hard to unwind. Second, as I listen to the music, all I want to do is just rest in his presence. That is so good, and although I had most of the day off, and did have a pretty good quiet time this morning, I have so come to love this time every night, when I just rest in His presence and spend time writing this blog. You see, every night I get to ask Holy Spirit what He wants to dhow me tonight. As He shows it to me, I write it down. Sometimes it is really a new revelation, other times it’s a reflection of times past. Many times it’s just a reflection of the day. The neat thing is He never fails to show up. I get His presence plus some direction in my writing. But tonight, His presence is just so calming I really don’t want to write. But He wants me to, so I will continue.
I used to think that my job as a parent would end when my kids were grown, married and on their own. I just couldn’t understand why my mother worried so much about my sisters. I would see her, and she would tell me how much she worried about one of my sisters in particular. I would tell her not to worry, my sister was grown and was making her own choices. There was nothing she could do about it, so why worry. My mother was a believer, and she prayed, but she only knew what she learned in the Baptist church. She prayed, but knew nothing about intercession or healing or spiritual warfare. She only knew how to worry. So that’s what she did. I thought that when our kids were grown it would get easier. I was wrong. When you love someone so much, you just want so much for them. I don’t worry like my mom did, but I sure pray and declare over them. I think that’s where I miss Julia’s presence the most. She was a great intercessor. She knew how to pray and what to pray for. I know that every morning she had long times with the Lord. I just don’t have that. For one thing, I don’t have the time available, but I also will admit that I am not as called to intercession as she was. That doesn’t mean I don’t pray of have time with Papa. I do, but not like her. So even though I know that she is praying in heaven, I miss her prayers down here. I miss praying with her, and talking about what we wanted to see God do not only in our kids lives, but in ours as well. My heart and her heart for our kids was nothing but love and wanting to see good things happen to them in every area.
If our hearts for our kids are like that, think how God’s heart is for us. He is never angry at us. He knows what we are going to do before we do it. He is never surprised, even when we blow it big time. He doesn’t punish us for our mistakes. Quite the opposite, He tries to draw us back into His love and rest. His grace is sufficient for all of our needs. He is so good, and we really still have no idea of how good He really is. If I would do anything for my kids, think how much more Papa wants to do for us. His heart is big, full of love and grace. He is quick to forgive and to restore. Look at Simon Peter. When he fell at the crucifixion, Jesus was quick to forgive and restore. I even think He would have restored and forgiven Judas if Judas would have let Him.
How we perceive God determines how we react to Him. If we know He is good, and His goodness is for us, we can repent quickly and receive forgiveness and restoration. But if we believe He is angry with us, we stay away until we think we are better. This causes us to lean on our works and that is a sin in itself. We have to lean into His goodness and allow His love and grace to restore and renew us.
So, our job is to learn to accept His goodness. Our responsibility is to act like we believe it, and let our love be manifested to others. We are responsible to bring the Kingdom into our sphere of influence. We can’t do this without believing in and resting in His goodness.